adultery: a deal breaker?

This weekend I went on a Black Leadership Retreat with my school (pictures coming soon!) and we talked about a bunch of topics. One of the most interesting discussions I had this weekend had to do with adultery. Adultery is defined as  "voluntary sexual intercourse between a married man and someone other than his wife or between a married woman and someone other than her husband;" Here is where the debate lies, if you were in loving marriage for a substantial period of time (at least 5-10 years) and your partner committed adultery, would you immediately, or ultimately resort to divorce. Some of the people I talked to said divorce would be their primary option. And that adultery is really the only thing that can break the bond of marriage and make it OK to end it. I somewhat disagree, I believe that in this day and age, marriage isn't taken seriously. People don't know or don't realize that marriage is hard. And its supposed to be for life. And there are going to be bumps in the road. I do not, in anyway, condone adultery, or any type of physical or emotional abuse but I just feel like people resort to divorce too quickly. After your first divorce, your chances of having a successful marriage continues to dwindle, drastically. I just think that if you are happily married and your partner steps out on your marriage, you owe it to your marriage and to yourself to examine why whatever happened , happened. I would hope that I know the person I marry well enough to know that that person is going to stick with me through thick and thin. People change, but I would hope that the person I make my husband changes for the better as we grow old together. Maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic, but I just believe that there is no way to determine what life is going to throw at you and sometimes we aren't going to be prepared. People make mistakes, and I believe in forgiveness and second chances. I acknowledge the fact that it could take a long time to re-cooperate from your partner breaking your trust, but I dont think its impossible to rebuild that trust and even possibly make it become stronger. But who knows, you never really know how you will act, unless you are actually in that situation. What do you guys think, is adultery a deal breaker in a married relationship?


  1. doesnt it depend on who you are cheating with? i mean like what if he cheats on you with your sister?
    like would you continue the marriage with your husband but lose contact with with your family member?

  2. Thats a good scenario...I dnt have a sister, but I mean you cant divorce your sibling. It may take a lot of time to forgive her....and I mean A LOT of time, but i think forgiveness is better than carrying around hurt and pain you feel for someone. Obviously that relationship would be strained and possibly even destroyed...but maybe not forever. As far as the husband goes, it would b a question of a one time mistake or does he have feelings for my sibling. I still stand by what i said, but i also acknowledge that I dont know how I would really act, unless i was actually in that situation. But to answer your question head on, yes. Who you are cheating with can intensify the hurt and the pain caused by the act, so it can also depend on that.


    1. Have you ever wondered what could happen when
      we descend to Temptation and Lust
      This is Baba's teaching to me when I
      stepped into Lust


      I had taken my mother to meet our friends one lovely evening.
      Little did I know that the Universe was going to teach me a Lesson!

      After a tiring day I was in Relax-singh mode.
      As I settled deep into the arm chair
      A woman walked in, she was lovely.

      I started admiring her, and before I realized it, I was in a kind of hypnotic daze.
      A telepathic voice started talking to me,
      "She is beautiful isn't she?"

      Yes I responded "She is lovely!
      "Would you like to have a relationship with her?"

      "I would love to have relationship with her," I mentally replied.
      This voice then took me into a deeper hypnotic trance
      with even more Lewid suggestions which I agreed to.

      As I continued admiring this beautiful woman, my thoughts turned into Temptation & Lust
      I saw a Dark shadow leaving her crown.

      Even the air around this Dark shadow was vibrating.
      The shadow then changed into a demon which in a twinkling of an eye
      entered me. Understanding then dawned on to me. This Demon had been talking to me!

      When we engage in Lust & Temptation we open our aura and bodies to all outside influences.
      I felt very uncomfortable as it made itself home into my body.

      Over the next 2 days my normally calm personality changed into Depression, Anger and Lust.

      I prayed to my master Babaji, for help.

      Sai Baba appeared, looked at me and spoke, "
      "How can God help you when you
      invited the Demons into you with your FREEWILL.
      You gave into temptation.
      You disobeyed the Basic Law of the universe.
      You attacked the lady with your psychic thoughts, and invited whatever
      was in her into you.
      In future watch your Lusty thoughts.
      This is your problem, Sorry bye".

      For 2 more days I suffered, This being started controlling my very thoughts, All I could do was watch as a bystander.
      My body, my temple of God was in control by another. I had become possessed.
      I was no longer in charge of my body.
      It wanted me to participate in Lust and other activities.
      I was slowly fighting a loosing battle.
      However I managed to keep my faith in God & Sai Baba

      2 Days later Babaji, forgave me and removed this demonic being from me.
      Be careful my friends. When we allow egoism, envy, malice, hate, greed and lust., our Aura breaks & negative energies walk in.

      I remember the teaching from one of Sai Baba's teachers :
      Hari das Baba, "Amarjit, much of the problems in humans today is due to spirit possession!".

      Recently Sai Baba spoke "Amarjit, strive to be purer then pure"
      The old man certainly is not lacking in his sense of humor!

      Purer then pure Wow!

      Amarjit Singh singhbam@aol.com


Any thoughts?